If I were to invent a radio station, I would be rich and famous. Because my idea for a radio station is way better than my other inventions and that’s saying a lot. [I’ve invented a better traffic light, a voice activated Palm/organizer that rewards you for talking to yourself while cleaning the house […]
And Now For Something Completely Personal
Wanted: You to get that gun out of my face so we can go to dinner and a movie. I’m well aware that I have an obsessive personality. It’s normally not a big problem, except when I’m packing lunches. Most of my obsessions are harmless. Like my thing with wanted posters and before-and-after weight […]
We Like Your Music, But Do We Have to Smell You?
So many ways to smell like a prostitute, so little time… I feel sorry for Britney Spears. Her cologne is on the sale shelf at Wal-Mart, in a box that’s consistently dented, and even the Christmas gift pack presentation can’t take away from the fact that she looks like a trailer park skank. Britney’s […]
Food For Thought
I tried to make a nice Thai dinner last Sunday. My son was coming home and I wanted to try a recipe from the Thai cookbook he bought me last Christmas. It’s a coffee table book, meaning it’s as big as a coffee table. It doesn’t fit on any shelf in my kitchen, so […]
Wedded Bliss: Quick, Celebrate It While You Can
My husband and I just celebrated our 24th wedding anniversary last week. I thought about waiting to write about this until the big 2-5 next year but if I’ve learned anything, it’s to not put important things off. By next year at this time we could be dead or in prison, for killing each other […]
How’s Your Ornament Hangin’
Sorry if I seem to go on and on about Christmas. But it’s not as if you can ignore it. Driving into my neighborhood, you’d think you were on your way to Santa’s Land of Gumdrops ‘n Double Mocha Frappaccinos. Even the Liquor Barn and H&R Block are festive. This week we put up […]