It’s that time of year, when Christians begin to look around their houses and go OK, enough’s enough. What was I thinking? And who can I pay to get it the hell out of here and back in the basement? Why the modern silver garland and the vintage forest greenery? What made me go whole hog […]
My Eyelash Problem
As I wind down 2014, I’m trying to take care of some loose medical issues so I can start the new year fresh. Or if not fresh, then with less decay. I’ve addressed teeth, feet, eyes, nerves, muscles, muffin-tops, hips and elbow skin. Now, with less than a month left in the year, I come […]
I’m So Vein
My veins are winning the race for most exasperating body part. They passed up my turkey gobbler and my cowlick and are closing in fast on my uterus, which has basically broken free of its restraints and is bothering its neighbors, namely my bladder. My veins are determined to make me feel every second of my […]
My Weird and Wonderful Christmas Ornaments
It’s Christmas tree decorating season and I’m happy to welcome our ornaments back to our living room. They are a motley, rag-tag community of misfits (although ironically, neither Rudolph or that dentist wannabe elf is represented). They’re all so darn precious to me, I can’t throw any of them away, even the Irish step dancer whose […]
When the Cat’s Away the Mouse Eats Like a Bachelor
Being on a diet and having a husband who’s out of town don’t mix. It’s a particularly deadly combo for the person who’s on a legitimate plan to eat right, because who’s going to have an ounce of sense when left alone with no one watching? My husband went to Dallas for a few days in […]
What Do You Mean You Don’t Eat That?
I love to cook for people and have been hosting meals at my house since I first got married and invited an Italian to my two-room apartment for manicotti and homemade Italian bread. I know. Ballsy, right? The thing is, I’ve always had an overabundance of confidence when it comes to cooking. My mom was […]